Making fun of bad logo designs is lame. So, let’s say that Xerox’s new logo is just fine, if a little curvy/Speed Racery looking, and move onto that weird ball thing next to it.

Around the office here we are thinking what it might represent. Surely there will be a corporate short story written about how it moves the company smoothly into its next phase or some equally ridiculous metaphor. I think it looks like a drag racer’s parachute. Jei thinks it resembles that Pokemon ball that the weird boy (?) kept those effeminate monster things in and threw at people. I’m sure we’re both right, but that’s not the point here. What follows is what Xerox might attach to their logo presentation to help us understand it more completely, and to justify the millions of dollars they spent on a logo that a college student might have handed over sheepishly to his design professor.

“The red sphere is at once familiar and mysterious, as it implies transparency and stability. It stands heroically next to its lower-case partner, instilling confidence as this new chapter of xerox advances. At its core the new mark of xerox is a streamlined thoroughbred, a coiled spring from which ingenuity will vault. Deep down, below the superficiality of its animal allure, lies the truth of xerox’s rebirth (mark). The sphere of a new day is also a reassuring nod to the past, as the confident x reminds us always of our upper case past.”

Pretty sweet, right? And it’s fun. Send your best (most terrifying) xerox logo descriptions and we’ll post them right up here.